The Inevitable Result of Binge-reading 14th to 17th Century English Poetry

A comfortable chair is essential!


 
Synopsis of 14th to 17th century poetry in English
 
Sumer is icumin in
Lhude sing cuccu 
Now’s the time for us to screw
For soon shall I die
And so shall you
Then throw in some Greek mythology 
Add a Roman warrior or two
Make sexual orthodoxy your barrier
To any variant shrew 
And forget not the urn
To which all mortal coils return
Avow our life’s purpose lies as hence
Oh future publishers amass ye pounds and pence
 
The impropriety of piety 
 
Give it a rest, poet
Debauchery is necessary
To run a church
Not an ossuary 
 
Detach from yourself
Maybe live a little
Leave the holy books on the shelf
Take a taste of sinner’s spittle
 
Don't make not sinning a sin
How can you atone
From what is just a spin
Of a barren bone
 
Only God claims existence guiltless
Don't chide your perfection 
Parishioners ignore your distress
Sin is your profession’s protection 
 
Your life seems a bore
But you act like such a sinner
What are Satan's wiles for
But to mark the path of a beginner
 
Consider Adam and Eve
Before knowing the serpent's fruit
Unable to conceive how to conceive 
Learned to become humanity’s root
 
They transitioned through transgression
Needing a translator to speak with God
This is the founding of your profession 
For which you should give the Lord a nod
 

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